So I’m getting an admit with a complicated history, right? One of those “__ year old male with h/o X, Y, and Z now s/p M complicated by A, B, and C with resulting D requiring M which is now s/p revision of X with resulting D who is now presenting with chief complaint of C ” patients.
Anyway, so that was fine. I have clinical skills. First things first – I carefully considered the most likely causes of C based on my extensive education in pathophysiology and instinctively deduced AHAHAHAHAHA aaaaah, haha nope.
sorry, can’t take myself seriously there.
Yeah, no, first things first – I looked up the most recent H&P in the EMR for reasons of borderline intellectual plagiarism.
As one does.
And do you know what I found, dear readers?
I found the following H&P, written by one of our illustrious fellows:
An H&P for this patient has been completed within the last 30 days. It has been reviewed and the patient has been examined with the following changes to the patient’s condition and exam: There are no changes in the patient’s condition or exam.
– Fellow McFellowton, MD
Followed by.. nothing. That was it.
That was the H&P.
Absolute shoddiness. That fellow should be ashamed of himself.
(… small side-note: also, why can’t we do that? I DEMAND THE RIGHT TO BE SHODDY.
NO ONE EVER TOLD ME SHODDINESS WAS AN OPTION IN <30 DAY BOUNCE BACKS.)
No. This will not stand. So I’m just gonna write
“An H&P has been completed for this patient within the last 30 days. It has been reviewed and the patient has been examined. There are no changes with the exception that this time the chief complaint is diarrhea, but otherwise, you know, samesies.
– Action Potential, MD”
I predict it will go… well.