Favorite medical aphorisms of the moment

Pathology:  “Generalists know nothing about everything.  Specialists know everything about nothing.  Pathologists know everything about everything, just a day late.”

Psychoanalysis:  “Everything is sex, except sex, which is aggression.”

Dermatology:  “If it’s dry, wet it.  If it’s wet, dry it.  When in doubt, steroids.”

Medicine:, “The 3 most dangerous things in medicine: a med student with a sharp object, a resident with an article, and an attending with an anecdote.”

Emergency Medicine:  “… sounds surgical to me.”

Any others?

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10 thoughts on “Favorite medical aphorisms of the moment

  1. The way I heard the first one:
    Surgeons know nothing and do everything.
    Internists know everything and do nothing.
    Psychiatrists know nothing and do nothing..
    Pathologists know everything and do everything, but it’s too late. “

  2. a chance to cut is a chance to cure. no guts no glory. never let the skin come between you and the diagnosis.

  3. For Derm it’s actually closer to: If it’s dry wet it, if it’s wet dry it, if it itches put steroids on it, if in doubt biopsy it…
    And of course you have all the rules from House of God – Age plus BUN = Lasix dose, if you don’t take a temperature you can’t find a fever, GOMERS go to ground, etc

  4. Radiologist: “What is the most commonly missed finding on an x-ray? The second one.”

    Internal medicine resident: “What is the most common cause of right sided heart failure? Left-sided heart failure.”

  5. More of a joke than an aphorism: Every dermatological condition is an urgency; if you don’t see a dermatologist right away, it’ll go away on its own.

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