Welcome! Good morning! Take your seats!
I’m so glad you could all be here for this mandatory meeting. Now, you may have heard some rumors about 3rd year – rumors that it’s filled with soul-crushing paperwork, vague directions, and a surgeon who has driven at least 2 students to suicide. We hope to set the record straight that those rumors are all absolutely true.
… Just kidding! Haha, jeez, lighten up everyone. No, those bodies were in too many pieces to be legally identified.
Let’s get right to it: How to schedule your rotations. It’s a simple process, really:
While we don’t have time to go through it in detail, if you’d like a closer look, this chart is on our website.
Oh, the young woman in the back – a question? Yes?
… Where on the website? It’s not, uh… well, I’m not quite.. Hmm.
Okay, look, it’s not there right this instant, per se. The IT guys are redesigning the site because “it’s impossible to navigate”, and I guess we’ll get it back online when they’re done? It should be soon, though – maybe a few weeks. One year, tops.
Still, I want to let you know that my entire office is here for you during the transition period. I know it’s difficult to schedule your life and med school at the same time.
So if you’re planning on having an important family event – such as a graduation, marriage, or tragic death – just give me a call! I can easily sit down with you and discuss how best to schedule this event so that it coincides with your vacation week.
But most importantly, remember: