Hold up, Internet – I need to be overdramatic about my sinuses.

Yesterday I woke up to the realization that, while I was sleeping, someone had apparently placed a tiny, delicate lawnmower into my throat and shredded it to pieces.  (Somehow also causing a raging sinus headache, cough, and an alarmingly unpredictable case of Sneezing Attacks.  It’s a medical mystery!)  (It’s a cold.)

This was not my favorite thing ever.  But I went to class anyway, fueled entirely on sudafed and a purse full of kleenexes, while sneezing constantly and just generally looking pathetic.

You can guess how much my classmates appreciated this.  But hey, sick or not, I still had the energy to be there, so.  (Related:  How is sudafed a legal thing?  I’m pretty sure the government is 1 crucial step off when they claim people use it to “make” methamphetamine, because oh my god, no one should be in that energetic a mood when they’re that sick. ever.)

Unfortunately (for me, not my classmates), not even the power of psuedoephedrine was enough to get my Death Crud-infested self going today, so I gave up on the “bravely/drugged-ly perservering” thing and leveled up to the “lying in bed miserable” thing.

And I would just like to state, as a point of order here, that this is the really unfair part of med school:  I spent thousands of hours studying Infectious Diseases this year, and the sum of my intelligence on this one is still just:  “It’s a cold.  Probably.”

I mean, sure – Medicine itself has known about the common cold for thousands of years without figuring out a cure, so the bar for knowledge is set pretty low there.  But still, I think it’s too bad that I don’t know more.  I mean, all I know for sure is that it can’t be the Black Plague, because Yersinia Pestis is transmitted by rodents, which I haven’t been exposed to.

(No, wait.  That is a lie that vastly overestimates the quality of this dorm.)

My point is, despite my lack of Infectious Disease knowledge, and the lame-ness that is “being debilitated by a stupid cold”, I would like to believe I am super justified in lying in bed tonight, watching Glee and eating takeout soup instead of studying.  (It’s like being “justified”, but more super.  Also, with 40% more jazz hands and matzo!)

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9 thoughts on “Hold up, Internet – I need to be overdramatic about my sinuses.

  1. Um…you’ve had infectoius diseases, you’ve had epidemiology, and yet you knew you were infectious and went to class anyway? As a fellow professional student I know why you went to class, but as a professional patient (if there is such a thing…there better be I’d like to at least earn a M.S from the School of Hard Knocks) I’m appauled. Since you are becoming a doctor, make sure you put the idea in the back of your mind that there are people who can get extremely sick from “just a cold.” I know as a doctor you aren’t going to get lay up in bed everytime you get a virus, but while you still have the option protect your fellow students from getting the med school crud.

    Now that I am off my soap box, feel better. Cold suck. Don’t feel bad about the soup and Glee party sometimes you just have to take care of you. 🙂

    • I understand, but 90% of our class lives in the same building and has been passing the Death Crud back and forth for the last 2 weeks. So in this case, everyone’s been showing up to class with the same thing for awhile – which doesn’t make it right, but it does diminish the consequences.

      Also, the class yesterday had required attendance, sadly (there was a quiz). Sessions missed due to illness = 0% (Only religious reasons result in an excused absence).

      So the combination of the 0% and the fact that everybody’s been exposed to this for the past 2 weeks in class does mean that I feel like it’s a fair call to just sit in the back away from people. 🙂

  2. I love going into work when I’m all sick and snotty…I love it even more when my supervisor comes up and goes “why are you here? You shouldn’t come to work with a cold. It’s not good for your co-workers” and I’m then able to point out that I would’ve called in sick, but their ridiculous sick time policy that requires that I be out for three days or more with a note from my doctor and THAT is a super-huge pain in the ass for someone who just needs to pound some Ny-Quil, sleep for 24-hours straight and then come back tomorrow. But, whatever…enjoy my plague, suckas.

    The last time that I DID stay home sick, though, I watched the entire first (unedited!!) season of “Rock of Love” on Netflix, so instead of matzo and jazz hands, I got boobies and f-bombs 🙂

  3. I don’t understand sudafed. I know multiple people who use it, but I don’t understand how it’s such a miracle drug. I’ve used it when sick on a couple of occasions and it’s resulted in hysterical tears and a near panic attack. And almost zero effect on my cold symptoms. Basically is yanks my emotions around without doing much to my body.

    Not Fun.

    Sorry you’ve got the death crud. HCP’s aren’t the only one’s who have to watch out that they don’t pass bugs around – and inevitably do. I talked to a friend last night who works at food supermarket. The “death crud” has been making it’s way around all the employees for the last two weeks…. and they all handle food. I’ve decided to avoid that particular store for a while, lol.

  4. Speaking of overdramatized sinuses, I went and saw a doctor about 5 days ago because I was suffering similar symptoms and needed a certificate for time off work. He went straight for the antibiotics prescription, which weirded me out because I thought they were reserved for more desperate times than the common cold. I came to the conclusion that he was being lazy/in a hurry because when I asked him “but are there pros and cons to taking them?” his reply was “Of course, there are pros and cons to everything… If you don’t want to take them, take vitamin C instead.” That was it. Thanks mate, take my $70 and I’ll just go home and google the options myself.

    I always put these kind of visits down as learning experiences for what not to do when I (hopefully) eventually become a doctor myself. I.e. Don’t assume your patient has an innate knowledge of medicine because they probably don’t. Seems common sense – but apparently that ain’t so common.

  5. “I mean, all I know for sure is that it can’t be the Black Plague, because Yersinia Pestis is transmitted by rodents, which I haven’t been exposed to.”

    Actually transmitted by fleas, not the rodents themselves, which just are a transportation system for the fleas.

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